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In Their Skin (2012) : Thou Shalt Not Covet...

November 9, 2012, 9:37 pm
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Is there anything more frightening than a home invasion? While examples of this sub-genre of horror have been done several times before - with many of those films being top notch - there always seems to be room for more fear-inducing cinematic outings of this nature.

In previous movies like Funny Games (both the original in 1997 and the remake version of 2007), À l'intérieur (a.k.a. Inside, 2007), Ils (a.k.a. Them, 2006), and the eerily effective 2008 film The Strangers, they have scared people shitless and made many think twice about being alone in an isolated home out in the boondocks.

But there is one thing I can say about these types of films. They scare me.  After all, what is more frightening that someone breaking into your home (and your life) and wreaking havoc? It's a primal fear in all of us - being invaded, hurt, even possibly killed - in our own home.  The thought of that fractures us to our very being - because we're supposed to be safe in the comfort of our own home, right?

All of the above referenced titles have made me so uneasy - so tense - that I couldn't get them out of my head for days after I watched them. So when I was given the opportunity to see the newest home-invasion flick, the IFC Midnight production  In Their Skin, I jumped on it.

Directed by Jeremy Power Regimbal and starring Selma Blair, Josh Close, James D'Arcy, and Rachel Miner, In Their Skin starts out quiet, with subtle nuances that map out a family's grief and recent heartache. We find out early-on that the Hughes family is struggling to put their lives back together after the death of their young daughter, and have come up to their rather swanky family cottage in the woods to attempt to get back to the normalcy that is their life. We are privy to the fact that a couple's marriage is skating on thin ice and this might be their last chance at redeeming happiness.

When they are awakened very early one morning by loud noises in their yard, Mark (Close, who also co-wrote the film) is startled to find a couple and their son rooting around in their yard.  They introduce themselves as the The Sakowskis, a family "just down the lane".  They have come to the Hughes house to meet their neighbors and bring them some fire wood. Huh?? After a blundering conversation that is more awkward than neighborly, the Sakowski's have somehow invited themselves to dinner at the Hughes'.  Believe me when I say: it is obvious to anyone watching that something is just not right with the Sakowskis - which the Hughes' are about to find out. 

Bobby (D'Arcy), Jane (Miner) and their son Jared (Alex Ferris) show up for dinner and eagerly  meet Mark's wife Mary (Blair) and son Brendon (Quinn Lord).  Almost immediately Bobby begins to ask personal (verging on intimate) questions about Mark and Mary's lives.  Jane is a mousy, ungraceful stray that takes all her cues from Bobby - who scolds her on occasion for doing or saying inappropriate things. It's obvious that she doesn't think for herself for fear of heinous repercussions. The dinner is disastrous, and the tension between the two couples could be cut with a knife. The conversation turns towards all the blessings that have been bestowed upon the Hughes family due to their well-paying careers and affluent lifestyles. Jealousy rears its ugly head oh so gingerly, but it is apparent that the Sakowski's are green-eyed and anxious to live their own lives like Mark and Mary.
Soon, Jared and Brendon head upstairs when Bobby suggests they check out Brendon's room, giving the adults the opportunity to become even more uncomfortable.

Bobby spills wine on himself seemingly on purpose, and is happy to be able to take his shirt off and replace it with one of Mark's.  As if this isn't weird enough, we soon are privy to the two boys upstairs activities, which ends up including Jared holding a knife to Brendon's throat. Screaming ensues, children are comforted, and the Sakowski's are asked to leave - nicely at first, then forcefully when it seems they don't want to make their exit.

Things take a hideous turn for the worse when the family dog is let outside after the Sakowski's have left.  A gunshot is heard, and then another - and Mark urges his family to hide out in the bathroom while he checks it out. Needless to say, the next thing we know, Bobby and Co. are back and ready to take over.  And I'm being completely literal here.  In a twist that is different than most other home invasion horror movies, it appears that Bobby and Jane don't just want to invade the Hughes' home - they want to live their lives.  There is a very chilling scene just after a violent outburst in which we see Jane imitate Mary with an intentional yet uncanny creepiness that makes the bizarre couple's intent glaringly obvious.

In Their Skin isn't breaking any molds here within the home invasion sub-genre, but what it does have going for it is fine performances by all the leads. I didn't even recognize Rachel Miner right away - the last thing I'd seen her in was Penny Dreadful (2006). James D'Arcy is a British actor whose next role is as Anthony Perkins in the upcoming Hitchcock (2012).  He's got crazy down pretty good here in this film, his Bobby is so eerily bizarre, so disturbing, that it sets the stage for the entire film. And though I've never thought much about Selma Blair's acting ability, I've reconsidered and would have to say this may be some of her most honest work.

If I were to find a fault with In Their Skin, it may be the almost unbearably slow pace.  I'm all for building tension - and this film has it in spades - but there is so much quiet time here that when you do have a bit of violence it can be a bit off-putting. But the suspense is palpable and causes an anxiety that doesn't show up in most horror films. The reason for that is simple: it could happen to you. And just as The Strangers warned us before, the reason could simply be because you were home.

In Their Skin opened in limited release November 9th.

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Book Spotlight: 8 Great Horror Anthologies

November 14, 2012, 6:02 pm
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Article by Marie Robinson

I have a serious obsession with anthologies. I love to go to used book stores and scour the shelves for rare and excellent horror anthologies! Here are a few of my favorites from my very own book shelf.

THE DARK: NEW GHOST STORIES edited by Ellen Datlow

First of all, everyone should get to know Ellen Datlow if you don't already. She is one of the greatest editors out there and she has a special place in her heart for horror; the book includes an introduction by herself. The theme of this one is obviously ghost stories and all from modern writers. I always have to check out the table of contents and there are few and here that just made me squeal! Jeffery Ford, Tanith Lee, Joyce Carol Oates, Ramsey Campbell and Kelly Link. You can definitely hear the modern voice in this anthology, and although I prefer the classic gothic voice myself, I do like to give myself a dose of the modern every once in a while, and this is the perfect concoction. It was released by Tor, one of my favorite publishers!
 
AMERICAN GOTHIC TALES edited by Joyce Carol Oates

Joyce Carol Oates (a.k.a. the shit) edited and introduces this collection of gothic horror stories penned by some of the greatest American authors. With 40+ tales, it showcases what it considered to be each others best, or most popular, as far as the horror short story goes. It contains Nathaniel Hawthorne's "Young Goodman Brown", Charlotte Perkins Gilman's "The Yellow Wallpaper", Washington Irving's "The Legend of Sleepy Hollow" and Henry James' "The Romance of Certain Clothes". There are a few hard-to-find stories by great authors; I was very excited to see the rare pieces, "A Lovely House" by Shirley Jackson and "A Rose for Emily" by William Faulkner. There were many tales and authors I had never heard of before, and I had great fun reading this book!

LATE VICTORIAN GOTHIC TALES edited by Roger Luckhurst

Although this collection only has a handful of tales, they are rich, thought-provoking examples of gothic literature.  There are two pieces by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle as well as one from Henry James, Oscar Wilde and Rudyard Kipling. What really sealed the deal for me was that this anthology included Arthur Machen's masterpiece "The Great God Pan", an essential piece for serious horror lit fans!
 



POE'S CHILDREN edited by Peter Straub

These tales are handpicked by living legend himself, Peter Straub, and are what he believes to be the best of the best of the last decade. These are not gore for gore's sake, these are truly terrifying stories, crafted with care by some of the most talented modern writers. The table of contents includes Ramsey Campbell, Kelly Link, and Glen Hirschberg, with, of course, an introduction by Straub, himself.

THE MAMMOTH BOOK OF HAUNTED HOUSE STORIES edited by Peter Haining

The "Mammoth Book of..." collection is one of my favorites. Not only do they give dozens and dozens of stories to read, they always pick the best ones! This one is, of course, contains stories about haunted houses, and each one has a fun little introduction and tidbits about the author and possible inspiration of the story. We get haunting tales by regulars like Algernon Blackwood, Charlotte Riddell, Ramsey Campbell, and Sir Arthur Conan Doyle; there is even the rare piece by Virginia Woolfe. It also has my FAVORITE story by Sheridan Le Fanu "Authentic Narrative of a Haunted House".
 
HAUNTED LEGENDS edited by Ellen Datlow and Nick Mamatas

These stories penned by modern writers are inspired by folklore and urban legends around the world. I wrote a review on this book that you can read here: (HAUNTED LEGENDS).

 
REALMS OF DARKNESS edited by Mary Danby

This anthology of "Nightmarish Tales of the Supernatural and the Macabre" stands out because it has an introduction from Count Dracula, himself--Christopher Lee. If that hasn't gotten you to add this to your Amazon shopping cart, the 50+ stories, written by the best of the best, will! Stephen King? Check. M.R. James? Check. Edgar Allan Poe, Bram Stoker, Washington Irving? Check, check and check! Plus some surprise appearances from H.G. Wells, Ronald Dahl and Agatha Christie. I must give shout-outs to my favorites Ambrose Bierce, Sheridan Le Fanu and Guy De Maupassant. And since I purchased mine at a used bookstore it came with yellowing pages and a wonderful smell - perfect!


PHOBIA edited by Charlotte Emma Gledson

I'm throwing this last one in for a bit of shameless self-promotion!! This antho was released at the beginning of September by Black Hound Digital Press. All of the stories carry the theme of (you guessed it) phobia and the psychological--or physical--effects of it. It just so happens to feature a story by lil' ole me, Marie, called "The Winter Wind". If you are interested in buying, I will provide the link here: (PHOBIA) . It is available for Kindle only and costs a mere $2.99.

*All right, that is it for now! But since I have an ever-growing collection of anthologies I promise to make another post like this in the future! Happy reading!!
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Saying Thanks For The Horror In My Life...

November 21, 2012, 9:45 pm
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...as we gather together
I've been rather MIA lately. I've been so burned out after the Festival of Lists that it's been rough getting a post together.  I've been watching a lot of films, doing some reading too - but just couldn't be motivated enough to sit down and blog, blog, blog.
But with Thanksgiving upon us,  I felt the need to mention some things I've been thankful for lately.

   *First off, I am MOST thankful for Marie.  My writing partner is a breath of fresh air for this blog and I'm so happy to have her on board. She's intelligent, insightful, and a terrific writer! And I rarely have to edit her articles/posts at all.  She keeps putting out quality work that is more than impressive for someone her age. And guess what? She's published.  You're going to want to check out her recent short stories that have been featured in two separate publications. One a magazine called Sanitarium, the other a book called Phobia available on Kindle.

*What's this I hear?  Vertigo bumped Citizen Kane out of the top spot in Sight & Sound's critic's poll in 2012? Whaaat? How exciting is that for us Hitchcock fans?? CK was in the top spot since 1952! So I am thankful for this awesome news. Why?  Because I LOVE VERTIGO WITH ALL MY HEART!

    *Speaking of Hitch, I'm thankful for the additions to my DVD library this year that feature my fave director:  Dial M for Murder, North by Northwest, Rebecca, and a new version of the aforementioned Vertigo.  I already own Rear Window, Strangers on a Train, The Birds, and (of course) Psycho.  I am slowly adding his films to my collection.  Next up:  Marnie, Notorious, Shadow of a Doubt...and who knows what else.  I'm just thankful for Alfred Hitchcock in general. Cannot wait to see Anthony Hopkins portray the master in the upcoming flick: Hitchcock.

    *I'm thankful for winning the Alien DVD quadrilogy from Matt House and his awesome blog Chuck Norris Ate My Baby.  I've never won anything (other than money by betting the ponies) in my life, so it was an honest pleasure to win something so perfect for a horror fan!

    *Michael Fassbender.  I'm so very thankful for Michael Fassbender. Seeing him in Prometheus pretty much made the entire film for me. Last year's Jane Eyre got me started as a major fan - and then I recalled he was the lead in Eden Lake. Another bonus. Having seen him in several other non-horror films (including his amazing performance in Shame) only solidified the obvious fact that he's not just another pretty face.  This dude can act!

    *I'm thankful for not being punished by having to witness the likes of Chernobyl Diaries, The Apparition, Piranha 3DD, House at the End of the Street, and The Devil Inside in their theatrical run. I did however, spend 5 bucks to go see Dark Shadows, and I bought The Tall Man on DVD without renting it from Netflix first. Hey, I'm not perfect.

    *In that same vein, I'm happy to report that I didn't get motion sick at Paranormal Activity 4.  Because I did not go see PA4.  And I honestly have no desire to do so. I guess I'm saying I'm grateful for not vomiting? Always a plus.

    *Sinister. I'm thankful for my theater experience seeing this one. While it wasn't my favorite film that I saw on the big screen this year (that honor goes to Skyfall, by far), I certainly enjoyed sitting alone in a darkened theater on Halloween afternoon, watching Ethan Hawke unravel an unsettling and horrific mystery while I munched on Sno-Caps and downed a smuggled-in Mountain Dew.

    *Speaking of Daniel Craig - I'm thankful to know the difference between a Dream House and a Dream Home.  The latter 2010 film (starring Josie Ho and putting out some of the most graphic kills I may have ever seen) was vastly superior to the poorly received 2011 psychological thriller starring (real-life spouses) James Bond and Rachel Weisz. Even though the cast was an accomplished and decent one, the film just dragged on for----ever. and had no cohesive moments whatsoever.  Blessedly, Craig redeemed himself for me with both Skyfall and The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo.

   *Thank you, True Blood, for a great Season 5.  Bill and Eric's bromance was a highlight, as was Alcide's ass. They raised the bar by bringing back Russell Edgington and by turning Tara into a vampire. Can't wait for Season 6!  And while it is taking a little longer to grow on me, I'm still grateful for American Horror Story! This year's Asylum is a no-holds-barred kitchen sink of horror. What won't they do next?  It's crazy and outrageous and I love it. Also worth mentioning that I am still a big fan of The Vampire Diaries.  Though geared towards people half my age, the storytelling is quite enjoyable and the guys on the show are fiercely good-looking. And guess what?  They have fangs and know how to use them. What a concept!  It really does succeed where Twilight falters.

    *And finally, the thing I'm probably most thankful for is The Walking Dead.  At the beginning of this season I was utterly distraught that DISH Network and AMC couldn't reach an agreement and AMC was taken off the programming schedule. It made me actually despondent that I might miss an entire season and have to wait until next year to rent it from Netflix. So I guess I should be thankful to DISH and AMC for working out their issues only three episodes into season 3, and I quickly caught up.
Personally, I think TWD is the best show on television, hands down.  Seems America thinks so too.

*In closing, it seems there has been an awful lot to be thankful for as of late. Horror is alive and thriving at the highest level - and this is one fan who hopes to see the trend continue!
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Thale (2012) : The Real Reason To Avoid Scandinavia

November 25, 2012, 8:07 pm
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Review by Marie Robinson

Of what little I have seen so far, I think I already love Norwegian horror. There is such a weirdness to it, a blunt tribute to the country’s folklore. The first Norwegian horror film that I can recall seeing is Trollhunter (2010), which is downright amazing and I have just viewed my second. It is entitled Thale (tall-eh) and it was released at the beginning of this year.

Directed by Aleksander Nordass, it stars brothers Elvis (Erlend Nervold) and Leo (John Sigve Skard). Before I continue let me just say that I watched a version that was very poorly translated into English, so I really only have the most basic understanding of this film and a lot of this is speculation. Okay—here we go.

Leo has that unfortunate job of being that guy who cleans up crime-scenes and has recently gotten his brother a job alongside him. They are at a house cleaning up the bloody remains of an elderly man (and Elvis’ resulting vomit) and it becomes instantly clear that there is some tension between these two. They have been out of touch for some years and are having trouble falling gracefully back into each others lives.

Elvis decides to do some poking around in the house and forces the door of a cellar, finding cans of food that have long-expired. Deeper within the basement he finds a strange room—you know, one of those with the newspaper clippings and drawings/photographs tacked all over the walls. There is a desk with a pile of cassette tapes and a tape player and a bathtub full of a milky substance.

Even though Leo instructs him over and over again not to touch anything, well… he’s just got to! Right?!
He starts playing one of the tapes and it seems to be some sort of audio journal, a recording of a man talking, and a woman screaming. This recording awakens something; the water stirs in the tub and a woman emerges from the water.

She looks seemingly normal, except there is a strange look in her big brown eyes, and she doesn’t speak a word. Leo, who seems to always keep his cool, insists that they wait for his boss (I’m assuming) to arrive before they decide what to do. While they wait, Elvis tries to get close to this woman—Thale—and maybe shed some light on her story. Although she cannot speak, Thale can project memories into Elvis’s mind through touch, and through this gift her past begins to unravel. But someone—or thing—is definitely watching, and there is a secret presence that lingers in the woods that surround the isolated house.

The questions that arise in Elvis’ (and our) mind(s) are: Was Thale kept here as a prisoner or for protection? What does everyone want with her? Is she of this world?

Even though I couldn’t have full comprehension of Thale because of the shitty subtitles I enjoyed this low-budget picture. The atmosphere is there—dark, dank; all of the mystery and the secretiveness are almost palpable. There is also a great sense of suspense—a real one, not that cheap, jump-scare shit.

These actors have done little else, and nothing mainstream, but I can honestly say everyone gave a good performance. The cinematography was good, the special effects… more like something you would see on a SyFy original flick, but I don’t think it took too much away from the film.

The real reason I was dying to see this film was because, of course, it was based on a folktale. And I don’t think I am giving anything away by giving you some background on the folktale—I have an obligation as resident expert.

The creature in question is called a Huldra, or Skogsrå (meaning Lady of the forest), and is a female forest creature. They exist in several different countries folklore, but we will focus on the Norwegian aspects of the Huldra since this is a Norwegian film! Hobbies include hunting and seducing men—sometimes killing or kidnapping them. They are often beautiful and naked and have a cow’s tail. The Huldra are usually feared by humans and are considered to be evil; many tales are told with a message to avoid them. There is also a creature almost identical to the Skogsrå in Swedish folklore called the Tallemaja, which means Pine Tree Mary. First of all, that’s just a fun name, but also the first bit, “Talle”, which means “pine” is pronounced exactly like Thale, so maybe this is where the filmmaker got his inspiration for the title character.

One more tidbit is that there are two places in Norway named after the Huldras. There is Hulderheim on the island of Karlsøya that means “Home of the Hulder” (a Hulder is a male Huldra) and there is Hulderhusan on the island Hinnøya, which means “Houses of the Hulders”.

This film is pretty hard to film at the moment, and seemingly impossible to find with a decent translation, but if you get a chance, I recommend that you watch it!
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Horror TV: The Future Looks Bright (and Bloody!)

November 27, 2012, 6:37 pm
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Daryl (Norman Reedus) is proficient in taking out walkers on THE WALKING DEAD
There's never been a better time to be a horror fan  - or a more appropriate time to try to put out a new show in the horror genre. With the resounding success of such shows as Dexter, True Blood, and most recently American Horror Story and the wildly popular (and critically acclaimed) The Walking Dead, horror has proved it is very much alive and well and prospering on the small screen. In fact, The Walking Dead is averaging over 10 million viewers an episode - a feat unheard of for a cable television show, let alone a horror product. Even more impressive is that it is in contention to rival The Big Bang Theory as the top-rated scripted show. TWD is currently the number one show among 18-49 year olds. And it's not even on one of the big four networks.  Seriously, WHOA! And I know I'm not alone when I say this season has been its best yet!

The success of the aforementioned shows, as well as newer shows like the genre-bending Once Upon A Time, Grimm, and this season's 666 Park Avenue (just canceled, unfortunately) are making it more acceptable than ever to be a horror fan.
The teen rage shows such as The Vampire Diaries, this fall's newbie Beauty and the Beast, and the long-running Supernatural continue to guide new generations to appreciate horror and turn them into long-term fans.
And now, we have three new shows to look forward to in the near future that are nothing if not horror.

HANNIBAL (Mads Mikkelsen)  inspects the flatware.
HANNIBAL tries to draw new blood from the character of  Dr. Hannibal ("the cannibal") Lecter - whose character rose to fame under the sublime (and Oscar-winning) performance of Sir Anthony Hopkins in The Silence of the Lambs. In the upcoming take on the story, the unstable doctor Lecter works closely with Special Agent Will Graham - a criminal profiler from the FBI.  Lecters special skill set will become an asset to Graham, though the two are bound to clash eventually when their personalities, as well as Lecter's other hobbies, come to light. Though I wouldn't want to have the unenviable task of attempting to bring life to such an iconic character as Hannibal, Mads Mikkelsen (the Danish actor who portrayed the crazy-cool, bleeding-eye villain in 2006's Casino Royale) has been cast as the serial killer shrink, and I'm on board with it, as Mads just reeks a creepy vibe.  Also cast is Hugh Dancy (aka Mr. Claire Danes), who is set to play Agent Graham, and Laurence Fishburne will portray Agent Jack Crawford. Looks interesting, to say the least.

Freddie Highmore and Vera Farmiga relax near the BATES MOTEL
In BATES MOTEL (A & E, 2013), we get yet another take on the life of Norman Bates and his dear mother.  Freddie Highmore (Finding Neverland, Charlie & the Chocolate Factory) will bring on the weird as Norman, and Vera Farmiga will star as his beloved mama, Norma. Billed as a prequel to the famous Hitchcock film, it has Norman as an awkward 16 year old who is having trouble adjusting to his new school (and his new town, apparently - as we discover when we meet the sheriff and his deputy who are keeping a close eye on Norman). Also in the picture will be Norman's older brother Dylan (Max Theriot), who apparently is a bit of a bad ass himself.  But I have my doubts he's as disturbed as our pal Norman is. As a rabid fan of Norman Bates, I will have to do a mental adjustment to accept anyone but Anthony Perkins as Norman. But I am wildly curious about this series and you can bet your butcher knife I'll be parked in front of the flat screen when this series premieres next fall. (Might get my shower out of the way beforehand, though...)


Kevin Bacon and James Purefoy star in THE FOLLOWING this January
And in THE FOLLOWING (Jan, 2013- FOX), Kevin Bacon stars as an FBI agent on the trail of a serial killer (James Purefoy, Rome) the likes of which the world has never seen before.  This baddie has discovered a way to reach out to other serial killers and - for lack of a better phrase - band them together to wreak collective havoc on the United States.  In my book, anything with Kevin Bacon in it is bound to be interesting, as I have enjoyed his many forays into the darker side of cinema - and now he's checking into the small screen.  Bacon's retired FBI profiler is brought in to try to find an escaped serial killer that he caught years ago.
This psychological thriller is getting a lot of advance buzz, and most of it seems to be on the positive side.
Bizarrely enough, it's brought to us by Kevin Williamson - more famous for his teen shows like Dawson's Creek and The Vampire Diaries. But I don't think I'm being too bold in saying that I have a feeling it's a long way off from those shows if Kevin Bacon is starring.  It also stars Shawn Ashmore (The Ruins, Frozen, Mother's Day) and Maggie Grace (LOST, Taken).

So, horror fans, get ready for some small screen horror, and in light of all the violence and gore that network shows like American Horror Story and in particular The Walking Dead get away with these days, we could be in for a real treat.

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Book Review: The Croning

December 11, 2012, 7:55 pm
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Review by Marie Robinson

Don’t bothering looking up the definition for “croning” in the dictionary, it doesn’t exist. This is a word, or a concept, whatever, made up by horror author Laird Barron. I got turned on to Barron earlier this year after seeing his name continue to pop up in anthologies. I could not forget his works and I definitely could not forget a cool ass name like Laird. I may have seen him featured in a magazine or it may have been I first read him in an anthology I reviewed calledHaunted Legends, regardless, I have been seeking him out since then.

His book, The Croning, is brand-spankin’ new and let me tell you I could not wait for it to hit the library self, I bought it on the spot. He has one previously published novel and two short story anthologies, one of which I have read, called Occultation. Honestly, stories from that collection come back into my memory time and time again. His style is that of the weird, the mythological, and often, the ancient.

Fuck, I’m rambling. Let me tell you about this book. To be honest, it starts off with a tale we all know, a certain Grimm tale about a tricky little dwarf with a tongue twister of a name. But we don’t dwell there; we are introduced to Don Miller, a geologist and an all around nice guy. Pretty easy-going, unless you talk shit on his wife, Michelle. The cunning and mysterious half of the marriage. Sure, Don knows he got lucky by scoring her as a wife, but he really starts to doubt the marriage when strangers start making Michelle out to be something strange, dark, powerful, and dangerous. How much does Don really know, and how much does he want to know?

Barron’s book is cosmic horror, but let’s not go comparing him to H.P. Lovecraft right off the bat. Okay, that’s not really what I meant, what I mean is that when I heard the words ‘cthulu’, and ‘mythos’, I kind of cringe. Harsh, I know, but I feel like that shit is so overdone! But what do I know? Either way, I think Barron makes cosmic horror cool again.

His voice is easy-going and casual, as if the narrator is a dear, foul-mouthed friend. But this, according to supernatural horror master M.R. James, is the only way to write a good horror story. If the dialogue isn’t natural, you won’t fall into comfort with the story and in the end you just won’t get scared. But believe me, Laird will getcha scared!
If you haven’t read any Laird Barron, here’s a story to start with. It is also available in audio, which is the way I enjoyed it, and it was awesome. http://nightmare-magazine.com/fiction/frontier-death-song/
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Excision (2012): AnnaLynne McCord Deserves An Oscar.

December 14, 2012, 7:08 pm
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It's not that Excision is an Academy Award-caliber film. It's really not. But AnnaLynne McCord (of Nip/Tuck and 90210 fame) puts forth one of the bravest and disturbing performances I've seen in quite some time.

Pauline (McCord) is a socially awkward eighteen year old with some pretty strange fetishes, and not just for someone her age.  She is obsessed with blood and has wild, unrestrained dreams at night about dissecting people, sex with naked corpses, bathing in blood - well, you get the picture.

By day she is a caustic teen with a terrible grudge against her dad (because he gave her herpes by giving her mouth to mouth while saving her as a drowning child - gee, what WILL they think of next?) and an even worse attitude with her mother (played to acerbic perfection by genre fave, Traci Lords).

It must be said, it's really hard to believe that McCord could actually be uglied up so much. I mean, she played a cold-hearted vixen on Nip/Tuck, and it's my understanding she played the same on the new version of 90210. It's almost hard to recognize her here and to be honest, her transformation is just about as impressive as Charlize Theron in Monster. To prove my point, I give you a pic from Excision and a pic of McCord all dolled-up, side by side >>


So anyway, Pauline goes about her daily life, which consists of attempting to find someone to take her virginity while she's having her period, trying to gain her controlling mother's love while at the same time pummeling her with vicious commentary, and dreaming of sexual gratification through the mutilating of human flesh.  This is a girl who pulls out a tampon and studies it fervently, while we watch.  I'm serious.
Yeah, nice girl.  And you thought May had problems...

The one thing Pauline does love is her younger sister Grace, who has cystic fibrosis and is in need of a lung transplant sooner rather than later. This piques Pauline's interest and her desire to become a surgeon no doubt stems from the need to help her sister. However, Pauline doesn't pay attention in class, and becomes violent enough on one occasion that she gets expelled from school - hence ending her surgical aspirations.


Traci Lords is very good as Phyllis, the struggling mother who finally admits that she can't love Pauline.  Try as she might, she just cannot accept her for anything other than the disturbed and potentially sociopathic head-case that she most certainly is.  She doesn't want to give up on her daughter, and attempts to normalize her by having her go to a cotillion (you mean they still have those?) and sending her to counseling with the local minister (a delicious cameo by John Waters!).  But Pauline always finds a way to ruin her mother's bid for structure and balance.
Roger Bart (Hostel 2, The Midnight Meat Train) is equally as commendable as Pauline's herpes-laden pops, Bob. You can tell he wants to help his older daughter but wrestles with conflicting emotions regarding her mental health and ability to actually love.

On the outside, Pauline doesn't even seem to want to fit in, as she behaves unspeakably in nearly every situation. She asks bizarre sexual questions in class, vomits on one of the "popular" girls and shoves another's head into the lockers. She talks to God on a regular basis, but not to pray - instead she tries to justify her wrong-doings and asks for forgiveness in advance of her bad deeds.  At first she seems to not even believe in a higher power, but as time goes by it really seems like deep down she is just trying to get his "okay".
She constantly schemes new ways to be unstable - and this becomes abundantly clear when we see her find a dead bird on the sidewalk, take it home, and proceed to dichotomize it and take out its organs.  You know something bad is imminent at this point.
But as much as Pauline seems like a hard-ass on the surface, deep down I think she just wants to be loved. She unfortunately hears her mother's breakdown and verbal admission that she is unable to love Pauline, and we see that this realization affects her fiercely, perhaps sending her even further down into the rabbit hole.

I'm not sure how much more I can say without spoiling the ending, so I'll just stop the synopsis there. To say this is a strange film would be an understatement. At times a very black comedy, Excision at its core is a story of a very disturbed girl with underlying mental issues brought to the surface by the stressors in her life and the realization that she will never fit in due to her weird fetishes and crazed obsessions.

And when I say AnnaLynne McCord deserves an Oscar, I mean it.  Of course the fact that this film is horror completely omits it from any end-of-year honors - but we don't need high-end prizes in horror - we know what's good when we see it.  And though Excision isn't a thoroughly amazing film - and in fact drags at times...sometimes a film is as good as its talent.  And the talent here shines.
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The Croning Review ~ Part Deux‏

December 17, 2012, 5:00 am
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~ by Marie Robinson

So last week I wrote up a review on Laird Barron's new novel,The Croning.  In relation to that review (which I seemed to have posted a bit prematurely), Mr. Barron, himself, was kind enough to answer a few questions for me!!

FWF:  What research did you do for this book?

LB:  I researched the history of the Olympia, WA region, and the Pacific NW in general; something I do for most of my stories that are set in those areas. I also looked into several international intelligence agencies--chiefly the CIA and Nation Security Agency.

FWF:  What is your favorite occult film?

LB:  The Exorcist and Session 9.

FWF:  What sparked your fascination with fear?

LB:  I’m not certain what the root cause might be, I only know that the attraction began in early childhood. My family read voraciously. We also entertained ourselves by telling stories--I discovered I had a talent for spooking my brothers with tales of the macabre and the uncanny. Perhaps I took a bit too much encouragement from their fright.

FWF:  A few of your stories feature a strong bond between protagonist and canine companion. We here at FWF are certainly huge animal lovers, would you say the same for yourself?

LB:  I love animals and have a soft spot for dogs in particular. My loyal companion Athena is a ten year old pit bull mix I rescued as a puppy. She’s been with me through thick and thin this past decade.

*Again, check out his new novel, The Croning, or any work of his if you haven't yet!! In my review I attached a link where you can read his story featured in Nightmare Magazine for FREE!!!

I would like to thank Mr. Barron for doing this for our humble little blog. Stay scary, dude!
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All I Want For Christmas Is A Good Ghost Story: Part 1

December 20, 2012, 5:00 am
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~ by Marie Robinson

Happy Holidays, everyone! Christmas is drawing ever near… There are some people who just love Christmas. Perhaps the most famous literary Christmas-lover was the great Charles Dickens.

Not only did he adore the holiday, he was a huge influence on it. I’m not kidding, this guy shaped Victorian Christmas. Tell me of a person who has never seen, read, or heard of A Christmas Carol and I will personally slap them. It was first published on December 17th, 1843 and sold over 5,000 copies by Christmas Eve. Over fifty film, theatre and television adaptations have been made. It is no wonder that Dickens considered A Christmas Carol to be his greatest achievement.

Before A Christmas Carol, Christmas in the mid-Victorian era was all about the Christ. And the mass. Come on, let’s be honest, no one wants to sit in church all fucking day. Of course, people were thrilled when Dickens came along and brought some secular fun to the season. He believed Christmas was all about being with family, dancing, laughing, giving to charity, and of course, telling stories.

If you don’t believe me that Dickens influenced Christmas, listen to Professor Hubert Lamb’s argument on the matter. He says that Dickens birthed the popular notion of a “white Christmas”. He went so far to prove his point and documented that a white Christmas occurred for the first eight straight years of Dickens’ life. Our bibliophile climatic researcher says that white Christmases are actually uncommon, but we have come to cherish them because of Dickens’ classic.

After the release of A Christmas Carol, the quintessential Christmas ghost story, Dickens decided to write a handful of others. He penned what were titled, “The Christmas Books” which included the short stories The Chimes (1844), The Cricket on the Hearth (1845), The Battle of Life(1846), and The Haunted Man (1848). Some are these are more supernatural than others, and most are hardly terrifying but he was determined and inspired to keep up the tradition. A few other Christmas ghost stories Dickens wrote are The Haunted House, Christmas Ghosts, The Trail for Murder and The Signal-Man which was adapted for the 1970 BBC mini-series A Ghost Story for Christmas. In reference to these tales author Peter Straub calls them, “A lively mixture of comedy, pathos, and the supernatural.”

A prototype of sorts to A Christmas Carol is The Story of the Goblinswho Stole a Sexton. Released in December of 1836 it tells of a man named Grub, who is near identical to Scrooge, and chooses to go mope around in the graveyard on Christmas Eve. There he meets a ghostly figure who tells him how much his life is gonna suck if he doesn’t cheer up. If you wanted to take a simple moral from these stories it would be “Christmas is awesome!” But we know that Dickens was trying to say a little more than that. We get the Scrooge archetype yet again in A Haunted Man, where a grouchy old man is forced by a frightful apparition to reexamine his life. Dickens used this plot device to encourage a reassessment by his characters and his audience. He believes that the Christmas season is not only for nostalgia but also for change.

“…for we are telling Winter Stories—Ghost Stories, or more shame for us—round the Christmas fire; and we have never stirred, except to draw a little nearer to it.” –Charles Dickens, Christmas Ghosts
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End of the year run-down: Goodbye 2012..(and Good Riddance!)

December 30, 2012, 2:15 pm
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 2012 was really a mixed bag for me.
Personally, outside of horror my year was kind of distressing. And while I won't get into those boring details, I will say it caused me to have a very uneven year as far as entertainment goes. 

While I think I've finished some of the best books I've read in years,  I have to admit I think I may have seen more awful films than good ones, or at least less original ones.  Television was pretty damn good though, so it probably all evens out in the end.  And let's be frank, thank heavens it's THE END.
I'm ready for 2013, how about you?

One of the best things that happened in 2012 here at Fascination with Fear is the addition of a fresh new writer.  Due to life getting in the way more oft than not, I needed a bit of help to keep FWF from gathering dust bunnies. After a bit of poking and prodding around the interwebz, I was absolutely blessed with meeting someone who has become like a little sister to me - a kindred soul who has been kind enough to take a spot at my side and help me out more than words can say.  So to Marie I say a great big THANK YOU, and I hope that you lovely readers have enjoyed her stellar articles and posts over the course of the last several months!  Please, stick with us:  we have such sights to show you!

The Walking Dead
Best Horror Experience of 2012:  Hands down, The Walking Dead.  While there has been an unbelievable amount of horror this year, in particular on television, I have no choice but to single out this utterly fan-fucking-tastic trip through apocalyptic walker-land. The emotions displayed within the realm of this show are really far and above most other scripted television these days. AND IT'S A SHOW ABOUT ZOMBIES.  This. Is. Epic.

Coming in a lukewarm second would be True Blood.  I loved the Bill-Eric bromance this summer, and was happier than tits on a bull that Alcide showed off well...everything...as much as he did this year.  More of that, please.
I haven't been as big an advocate for American Horror Story as last year, but don't get me wrong - it's still one of my favorites. 

Sinister
Favorite theater experience:  Sinister - I saw this on Halloween day, in a darkened theater, alone.  That made everything about it perfect, and the film itself was one of my favorites of 2012.  It really reeked atmosphere, had a terrific lead actor, and was truly chilling.

Eighteen Horror Purchases I'm Happy With:
*Absentia - Probably one of my favorite indie films, maybe ever. Just one of the creepiest little films I've seen in years.
*Lovely Molly  - Somewhat flawed with confusion at times but eerie and tense and right on the mark.
*Murder by Decree - A 1979 film with Christopher Plummer (one of my faves) starring as Sherlock Holmes investigating the Jack the Ripper case. A fellow horror pal recommended it - much appreciated!
*Alfred Hitchcock: Legacy of Suspense (2011) - A bargain DVD that includes some of Hitch's older flicks such as The Man Who Knew Too Much, Sabotage, The 39 Steps....among others.
*The Walking Dead: Complete Second Season - Goes without saying...
*The Woman in Black (2012) - While I still prefer the 1989 original version, I did like this one a lot. It still managed to capture the isolation of Eel Marsh House and the dread when the volatile title character appeared.
*Spider Baby - The 1964 (do we say) classic about one fucked-up family. A must see!

Event Horizon
*Event Horizon - Seriously one of the weirdest yet intriguing sci-fi films of the 90's, with a stellar cast.  Almost like Hellraiser in space.
*Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1978) - Funny enough, I didn't own this one till this past October. So glad it's finally on my shelf!
*Diabolique (Criterion) - The 1954 masterpiece of murder and suspense.  It's said Hitchcock was rather irked that he didn't get his hands on the classic novel first.  And this Criterion edition is superb.
*The Yellow Wallpaper (2012) - Though at times an uneven film, the heart of the story is unnerving, to say the least.
*Gosford Park - Robert Altman directed this period mystery starring some of Britain's best.
*Wendigo - I've been looking for this 2002 film on DVD for quite a while.  While not the most stellar film, there is something inherently spooky about a family spending time in the winter woods and happening upon a scary Native American myth that has apparently come to life. Little seen, but I like it loads.
*The Entity (1983) - While parts of this one don't hold up well nearly 30 years later, Barbara Hershey's performance is undeniably fantastic.
*Eden Lake - Because I love Michael Fassbender. Period.
*Jaws (1975) - Um, yes I have several editions of this, my favorite film, on both VHS and DVD, but hey - this is the just released Blu-Ray.  Never mind that I don't even own a Blu-Ray player yet...
*Prometheus - A Christmas gift from my astute hubby.  (Of course I did give him a list, but still....)
*Vertigo - Because my love for this film knows no bounds...

Excision
Seven favorite Netflix rentals this year:
*Excision - AnnaLynn McCord totally embodies the role of a misfit with a penchant for blood and sex fetishes.
*Grave Encounters - Generally I detest the found footage sub-genre, but this one really did light my fire and caused some actual chills.
*Trollhunter - Another film that used the shaky-cam to induce fear, I happened to enjoy this romp in the Norwegian woods. It never gets too serious, which is part of its charm.
*Martha Marcy May Marlene - Elizabeth Olsen is very good in this film that just goes to show cults are still alive and well and taking control.
*Rabies - Those Israeli's know how to make a horror film!  Who'd have thought???
*Dream Home - As opposed to Dream House, this one just rocked. Josie Ho was unreal. Watch this film!
*The Loved Ones - Just a seriously fun horror film that proves if someone asks you to the prom, just go. Take my word for it.



Dream House
Six "why the hell did I rent this?" rentals from Netflix -
*Beneath the Darkness - Just a god-awful piece of crap starring Dennis Quaid. Guess I should have known.
*The Woman - Everyone loved this. I did not. Matter of fact, I DISliked it, a lot. Just redundant and lame.
*Don't be Afraid of the Dark - Just not scary at all. Completely pointless remake. I cannot believe Guillermo del Toro wrote this screenplay and produced this lemon. Ugh.
*Dream House - Oh Daniel.  Really? All I can say is thank heavens you found your future wife while making this film or it would all be for naught.  Really, REALLY bad.
*Wrecked - I wish I could say I could give a valid opinion on this film, or understand just wtf was going on.  But I think I may have fallen asleep from boredom.
*Atrocious - STOP WITH THE FUCKING SHAKY-CAM ALREADY!

The Tall Man
Three "I wish I'd have rented this first so I'd have known not to buy it" purchases:
*The Tall Man - The new Mrs. Justin Timberlake in a massive fail with a great premise. I mean, who hasn't heard stories about "The Tall Man"?  See:  Slender Man. See: Marble Hornets. Please.
*The Cabin in the Woods - While I didn't dislike this one, I didn't love it like everyone else seemed to.  I feel like I could have just rented this and not bought it outright. Not sure when I'll really want to watch it again.
*Outcast - Though the atmosphere was really spooky, with celtic legends and witch-hunting and all, but parts of it were too damn slow. Could have rented and would have been happy.

Chernobyl Diaries
Eight films I'm pretty glad I DID miss and have no real intention of seeing in the future:
*Chernobyl Diaries
*House at the End of the Street
*Paranormal Activity 4
*Piranha 3DD
*Snow White & The Huntsman
*The Devil Inside
*The Collection
*Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance

My thoughts on films I was looking forward to in 2012:
*The Woman in Black -  Many people didn't like this one, but I enjoyed it a lot.  I love the original story and certainly have been an advocate of the story as well as the 1989 version (still vastly superior), but I thought this one held its own, and showed that Harry Potter can move on to adult films. And I don't mean that in the porno sense. (Though there was that play with naked Daniel and the horse, right??)
*The Yellow Wallpaper -Not quite as creepy as the short story, but it has its moments.

The Awakening
*The Awakening - Very effective ghost story that I am still waiting on a DVD release
*Dunderland - Still unable to find this film anywhere
*The Raven - John Cusack is a funny guy. It shows here, with him playing Poe and lightening up the mood with witty banter amongst the dead corpses.  Interesting.
*The Silent House -  Yeah. Um. Pretty much the same as its Uruguayan counterpart, so I didn't see much reason to have re-done it.  But then again, I feel that way about most films.
*The Grey - It's Liam Neeson, folks. A very good man vs. nature adventure film. Wolves can be downright scary. But I think we already were aware of that after Frozen.
*Prometheus - Even if I hated this film to its core (which I didn't), I could not put down a film that I get to see Michael Fassbender act in.  I think you all know how I feel about him.

Rabies
*Rabies - Lived up to my expectations and more, really.  Israel can do horror. Nothing wildly original, but I really did enjoy this one.
*The Dark Knight Rises - Holy crap! This was made in my backyard of Pittsburgh and I haven't even seen it yet.  I haven't rented or bought it yet....so I reserve judgement until 2013. But I have heard it rocks.
*Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter - Yet to see, not sure I'm going to anytime soon.  The book was fun but the film just looked flat to me. Hard to adapt that kind of silliness.
*Dark Shadows - Um. Okay, not my favorite Johnny Depp film. Was expecting (hoping) for a true gothic film,  at least more along the lines of Sleepy Hollow than what we were given.  I did like the use of Nights in White Satin over the opening credits. That's something, right?
*World War Z - Still not released yet, but I honestly haven't heard very good things about it, so I'll obviously be waiting for DVD in this one.
*The Expendables 2 - I love me some Jason Statham. The film was nothing but shooting guns and testosterone, but hey - I'll take it.  Again, I can't hate a Statham film. Bring on Expendables 3.


Mama
Fifteen upcoming 2013 films that have peaked my curiosity -
*Mama - This will certainly be my first horror experience in the theater in 2013, as it opens in January. I am loving the trailer and the television spots, so we shall see! Looks awesome!
*Pacific Rim - del Toro brings monsters from the sea back into the limelight?  Count me in. I hope the monsters kick the robots asses. Call me a sadist if you will. The added bonus of SOA's Charlie Hunnam makes it even more worthwhile.
*Stoker - Hey! The dude from Prison Break (Wentworth Miller) wrote a screenplay! And this is it. Oh, and apparently it is not a vampire film.
*Warm Bodies - A zombie rom-com based on a book and poised to be the next Twilight. Wait a tic....do I really want to see this?
*Horns - Based on the book by Joe Hill, it stars Daniel Radcliffe as a man who grows horns out of his head. Yep, it sounds weird. So it should be fab.

The Evil Dead (2013)
*Paranoia - A thriller with Gary Oldman and Harrison Ford.  How can we go wrong?  (Oh yeah, Amber Heard is in it.............crickets.........)
*I, Frankenstein - Not exactly sure what is going on with this one....but Bill Nighy is in it, so I'm on board.
*Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters - This could be fun, right?  I'm not much for horror comedy, so I'll have to wait and see how this one goes...
*Oz: The Great & Powerful - Sam Raimi makes an adventure film that's a prequel to the age-old favorite about the Wizard.  I'm just not sure how I feel about this one....
*Jurassic Park 3D - Normally, I don't go in for the 3D phenomenon. In fact, I hate it. But goddammit, it's dinosaurs!  I'll put on those annoying glasses one more time!
*The Conjuring - Dude from Saw and Insidious decides to make a film with two words in the title.  He's really changing things up, folks! Look out!
*The ABC's of Death - Sounds like a pretty big project: 26 horror shorts packaged in one film. Um...?
*Carrie - WHY this needed remade is beyond me, but I do like Chloë Grace Moretz a lot, so I'll give it a chance.
*The Evil Dead - Another remake. Sigh. But I think this one might be worthwhile. And I feel sure it will kick some ass at the box-office.
*The Lords of Salem - Satanic witches and Rob Zombie. Yes, I am interested.

Favorite Book I read in 2012 - The Seance (by John Harwood) - Though written in 2009, I just got my paws on it this year and I have to say it's one of the best gothic/victorian ghost stories I've ever read.  I loved it.

Non-Fiction:Reel Terror - A great book on the history of horror. I couldn't put it down.

Runner up -  The Wicked (by James Newman) - Originally published in 2007 but re-released in 2012, you can read how much I loved this book right here.

Book I'm most looking forward to in 2013 - Doctor Sleep by none other than Stephen King.  It's been a long time since I've been truly excited about a King release, but seeing as how this is the sequel to The Shining (my fave King title), I'm over the moon and anxiously awaiting.... (projected arrival 9/2013)

Favorite Movie Score: The Woman in Black by Marco Beltrami.  Moody enough to evoke chills and dark enough to make me happy.

Favorite Movie of 2012:  Skyfall. Yes, it's a non-horror entry but hot DAMN was it a fine film! I really can't say enough about the latest 007 installment, and it is actually speaking for itself by hitting the BILLION dollar mark this weekend.  I love Daniel Craig. Apparently everyone else in the world does as well...

Random Year-End Awards:

Wrecked
*The "I can't believe I sat through the whole movie" award:  Wrecked. I'm sorry Adrien Brody, this was all over the place.  I may have even snored.

*The "Surprise! This remake was actually good" award: The Woman In Black. While not crazy-fantastic, I still loved it.

*The "When the hell is this title going to get a domestic release" award: The Awakening....though last year's winner of this award (All The Boys Love Mandy Lane) STILL isn't available.  Ditto that to Cold Prey 2. You cut me deep, Norway. You cut me deep.

*The "What the hell is this movie about, anyway" award: Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy. Oh heavens. I was waaay too tired when I put in this DVD. I know it's a good, critically acclaimed film, and maybe someday when I'm loaded up on caffeine and have a couple hours to kill, I will check it out again.

*Bloodiest movie I saw in 2012:  I watched Martyrs again, so...

Cabin in the Woods
*The "It better be as good as everyone says because I'm damn sick of hearing about it" award:Cabin in the Woods.  And while I liked it well enough, I have to say I didn't think it was the next coming of Christ or anything.

*Most curious title of an upcoming film:  John Dies At The End.  I guess it begs the question of how he arrives at that point.

*The "SO didn't live up to the hype" award:  Dark Shadows. Oh Johnny, it was only mediocre, hun.

*The "I really don't give a shit whether I ever see this" award:Piranha 3DD. Ugh. Spare me, please. I've seen enough titties and blood for a lifetime, I don't need them all condensed into one movie.


A Christmas Carol
*The "I can't wait for a sequel" award:  Prometheus. As long as Fassbender shows up, I'm in.

*Movie I'm most looking forward to in 2013:  Mama.  And I don't have long to wait. (Jan 18, 2013)

*The "This is what I'm watching tonight so I have to get off the laptop" award:  A Christmas Carol (the George C. Scott version, natch) - because the hubby and I were too damn tired on Christmas night to watch it.
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John Dies At The End (2012) : Please Pass The Soy Sauce!

January 5, 2013, 3:41 pm
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Do you like dogs that can drive a car? Have you ever thought of using a bratwurst as a cell phone? Do you like basement monsters made of meat? (Yes, you heard me - and I'm not talking about Lady Gaga's meat dress, either!)
How about doorknobs that turn into penises before your very eyes? If you said yes to any of the above then by all means, you need to check out John Dies at the End. 

I've not read the source material - a novel by David Wong, so I was coming into this one rather blind.  Generally I like to read a book before seeing the film but in this case it was not to be.  Though I have looked at the book several times in the book stores.

But seeing as how it was adapted for the big screen by Don Coscarelli of Phantasm and Bubba Ho-Tep fame, I was definitely interested in seeing this so-called horror-fantasy-comedy.  And that is just what you get. At times feeling a little bit like a cross between a Hunter S. Thompson adaptation and a Sam Raimi movie, it really does jump all over the place - and kind of made me feel like perhaps it would have been more enjoyable if I were stoned out of my mind.
That's not to say that I didn't enjoy the movie.  It has its own weird charm. Kind of like an acid trip - if only I knew what that was actually like.  I get the feeling I was pretty close.

Meet Dave. 
Dave (Chase Williamson) is a likable twenty-something slacker who's got a tale to tell. 
Meet Arnie.
Arnie's (Paul Giamatti) just the guy to tell it.  These two meet up in a creepy, dark-lit Chinese restaurant to discuss recent events in Dave's life that are almost too insane to believe. Apparently there is a new type of street drug known as Soy Sauce, which causes wild hallucinations and the ability to not only talk to the dead but to be able to experience alternate universes & realities.

By using this "sauce", Dave is able to tell Arnie the amount of change he has in his pocket and the dream he had the night before.  When Arnie seems slightly more agreeable to listening to Dave's story, Dave relates how the night before, he met up with his friend John (Rob Mayes) at a party and they were introduced to a Jamaican named Robert Marley (seriously...) who was coincidentally bitten by their friend Amy's dog, Bark Lee.  Robert gives them some of the sauce and kabam!  Their whole world and their reason for being is completely changed. Well, they are still dudes who like to get laid and get high, but now they have the world to save!

The bulk of the film is Dave and John moving in and out of otherworldly dimensions, trying to come to terms with the weirdness that is their life and save the fucking day.  It all pans out in unbelievable moments and a shit-load of one liners and if I'm honest, confusing interludes. Absolutely nothing is as it seems. There are giant leeches, magic "ghost-doors", eyes popping out of their skulls like a Fulci film, demon possession, talking dogs, exploding heads, portals to other worlds, the aforementioned monster made of deli-meats, giant spider-crab creatures, a girl with a horrific-quality artificial arm/hand, and a weirdo tv paranormal expert (the excellent Clancy Brown).  The main villain (if we can call it that) is a conscious and responsive computer intent on destroying society in this dimension as we know it. Say whaaat?
Holy hell, we even get an Angus Scrimm (The Tall Man, for those who have led a Phantasm-less life) cameo. 

I do have to mention that it was fairly obvious that budget constraints really wreaked havoc on their ability to have decent CGI effects, but that said, the practical effects are quite good.  There was a lot going on in this movie - a whole lot of unique and interesting creatures and monsters - and the lack-luster CGI didn't harm the end product too much, if truth be told.  The acting was good - in particular by newcomer Williamson, who despite the bizarre premise and circumstances makes this freak-fest seem like a buddy film of the horror-friendly kind. Paul Giamatti (one of my very favorite actors) is not given a whole lot of screen time, but what he does have was wildly entertaining and very "him".  He's one of the producers of the film so he obviously had his heart and soul into his performance.

All in all, I doubt it's a film I'd want to watch over and over, as my kind of horror comedy leans a little closer to Shaun of the Dead than Bubba Ho-Tep, but I can understand how the word in genre circles seems to be that this film will gain cult status quickly. And I'm not sure they're wrong.  For everything I didn't understand, it was rectified with preposterously funny segments and ridiculous comedic moments. Which more than made up for the confusion that wracked my brain throughout most of the running time. Again I say, it may have been easier to swallow if I'd had several shots of Jim Beam prior to viewing. 
But give this one a chance - it would be fab on the big screen.
Opens Jan 25.

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Mindless Movie Monday: The Apparition (And The Sad, Sad State Of Ghost Stories Today)

January 7, 2013, 5:00 am
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It has become increasingly apparent to me that there are no good ghost stories anymore.  I'm sick as hell of renting (and at times purchasing) horrific examples of supernatural films that are infinitely less scary than the DMV on a Monday morning.  Case in point:  The Apparition. 

Even though I knew it was going to be awful, I still rented this flaming sack of cow dung just to see how bad it really was. Well, it's a boring, utterly ghastly (and not in a good way) movie about a couple that are house sitting a property that belongs to the girl's parents. Said girl - Kelly - is played by the very pretty Ashley Greene of Twilight fame, with boyfriend Ben (Sebastian Stan) hanging the moon for her pleasure. 

At the very beginning of the movie we see Ben, doing his best ghost hunter impression with a few other like-minded folks...except they bring something back (from beyond....um, yeah - that's original) that is now following them, including our guy Ben. Which means Kelly is in trouble too, as it has emerged as a force to reckon with at their current living space.

"Stand back! I won't allow them to steal your teddy!"
When the neighbors loveable dog finds his way into the couple's home, lies down in their laundry room and promptly dies, I knew this film was not for me. (What makes filmmakers feel the need to off the family pet? Do they think that serves some purpose in the film - as if "Wow! They killed the cat/dog/horse/bunny/gerbil, etc! I'm REALLY afraid now!" - It's more like, I'm pissed and probably never going to watch your crappy excuse for a movie again, god dammit!)  And that only served as proof that The Apparition was bound to get worse.  The couple does so many stupid and ill-advised things, acts that are so clichéd it's nearly unwatchable. No originality and lack of plot plague many films these days, but I would be hard-pressed to find one so blatantly trite and unimaginative as this dud.  I really can't say much about it because though it's trying to be a ghost story, it's failing miserably and NOTHING IS HAPPENING!

The two leads are trying here, and it can be said that they did give it the old college try. But though they may be good in other films, they struggled to hit the mediocre mark here. It was almost laughable how many ridiculous facial expressions Ashley Greene delivered.  Funny thing is, they all ended up virtually the same. All looking somewhere in between constipated and bored to tears.  LIKE ME.
Thankfully for the male viewers of the film, she showed a bit of skin.

The Many (?) Faces Of Ashley Greene

Plainly said, this movie is so outright boring that I was actually writing this review as I suffered through it.  All we were subjected to were loud noises, lights flashing off & on, some carefully placed shrieking, doors opening by themselves, and strange molds growing on the floors, ceilings, and of course in the basement. (Why do spirits these days feel the need to manifest as MOLD?  Try something less icky next time!) Kelly finds out Ben was lying to her (which in all actuality he just 'didn't tell her' all about his past spook hunting and "scientific supernatural studies") and she swiftly kicks him out of the house - leaving her alone to face the ghost/demon/entity of the week all by her lonesome. Have we learned nothing from watching past horror films!?

"No! We can't watch this crap anymore, dammit!'
Friends, we can do so much better than this. We HAVE done better. See The Changeling, The Haunting, The Legend of Hell House... Christ I'll admit even The Grudge and Paranormal Activity were better.  I just don't get why studios keep green-lighting dumb-ass movies like these ones. I was so disinterested in this about ten minutes in that I nearly turned it off. Figured I'd keep  watching so I'd have something to write about! Shitty crap like this, Pulse, The Fog (2005), The Unborn, and the vast array of junk available that are trying to pass themselves off as scary are doing nothing but killing the sub-genre.

Now THIS is what I'm talking about....
(The Innocents, 1961)
Where are movies like The Woman in Black (1989)? The Innocents?  The Devil's Backbone? Though a rare gem breaks through occasionally, such as The Awakening, most ghost stories are just bullshit.  Why aren't studios trying to find someone who will adapt something truly chilling, like any number of works by Ambrose Bierce or M.R. James??  I read two awesome books by John Harwood last year - The Seance and The Ghost Writer (not the one adapted into the Ewan McGregor film)- both if which seem fairly adaptable to me, and would translate to film fantastically. The Seance would be a wonderful period ghost story that would float the boat of any fan of the supernatural.   But instead we are forced to watch this regurgitated dreck that wouldn't scare a two year old. Gah!!
So believe me when I tell you - don't watch this movie unless you are faced with making the decision to either watch this film or watch paint dry. 
I know what I would choose.
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Sunday Bloody Sunday

January 13, 2013, 5:00 am
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Let Me In

Excision

Wrong Turn 4

Ghost Ship

Sinister

Midnight Son

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Mama (2013) : Maternal Instincts Are A Bitch

January 20, 2013, 7:08 pm
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Haven't we seen enough CGI ghosts to last a lifetime? Guess not, as producer Guillermo del Toro lends his name and reputation to the latest spectral concoction of contrived story-lines and computer-generated frights.

Not to say that Mama isn't entertaining for the most part, but when we finally witness the horror that is the title character, I found myself sighing and wishing I'd have waited for DVD.  There are some requisite jump scares and some chilling moments here and there but for the most part I will have to admit I was not scared. And that, rather than body count or creative kills, is what I'm looking for these days, so I thought Mama would be firmly in my wheelhouse.

Monsters and ghosts that are computer generated just lack the finesse to produce any kind of visceral reaction from me. And if that sounds snobbish then so be it.  I am a practical effects junkie and for the most part detest CGI (unless of course it is very good CGI, read: Jurassic Park or Lord of the Rings - but hey, not everyone can get WETA to join their production!)

However, the basic story of Mama (based on a 2008 short film by director Andres Muschietti) is a compelling one.  It highlights the maternal instinct pretty hard, proving once again that a mother's love knows no bounds. And in horror films, that usually results in moms reaching out from beyond the grave to assist or protect their children.  Which is just what we have here.

A father whose life is upended by financial ruin kills his wife (off-camera) and steals away with his two young children, Victoria and baby Lilly.  He is so distraught that he drives off onto snowy roads and flips the car over an embankment.  Amazingly, the family of (now) three manage to survive the crash and walk off into the woods, happening upon a deserted cabin looking akin to the Evil Dead cottage. Not good.

After a few hours sitting around, Dad of the Year decides it's best to just off the family, so he attempts to distract Victoria by telling her to look out the window. Just before he pulls the trigger on the gun he has aimed at her head, someone -or something - attacks him from behind, effectively ending his macabre plan (and his life, apparently).  Hence the youngsters are left in the cabin to fend for themselves.

Moving ahead 5 years (yeah, right. Five years in the woods alone. Okaaaaay.), and we have the uncle of the two girls who has been actively pursuing leads and still searching for his brother - all this time.  Lucas (Game of Thrones' Nikolaj Coster-Waldau) definitely deserves Brother of the Decade, if we're not done labeling people.  He's even been paying people to keep up the search.

One day, the two men employed to hunt for his family find the wrecked car and eventually discover the isolated cabin.  What they don't expect to find is Victoria (Megan Charpentier) and Lilly (Isabelle Nélisse), living in squalor and filth and behaving like animals.  Probably the most frightening part of the film is seeing these two young girls acting like feral beasts. The scurry across the floor and jump from table to refrigerator like demented monkeys.  I've seen movies with feral children (Shiver, The Woman) but just one glimpse of these forgotten tykes had me shivering.  By far the creepiest moment.

Once Lucas and his rock-band girlfriend Annabel (Jessica Chastain, looking not unlike Joan Jett here) find out the girls are alive, they do everything in their power to make sure their nieces stay with them and not with a wealthy aunt from the "other side of the family". With the help of child psychiatrist Dr. Dreyfuss (Daniel Kash), the couple does indeed end up with the kids, and a new house to boot - provided by Dreyfuss for psychiatric research studies.  A long period of adjustment begins, with the older Victoria coming around gradually, in part because she was older and retained some memories of normalcy.  Lilly however, remains unapproachable - practically growling at every turn.

One of the troubles with this type of storyline is believability. It's truly hard to fathom that children taken from horrific conditions such as these, with no real grasp on the world, would be placed with anyone - let alone a couple who are 1) not married 2) not financially stable 3) seemingly irresponsible 4) have careers lacking any sense of accountability or future...the list goes on.  These children would need to be in a psychiatric setting for quite some time.  But alas, it's only a movie....

Soon we (meaning us, the audience) are privy to the fact that Mama has followed the girls to their new home and has no intention of giving them up.  After Lucas has a Mama-induced mishap and falls down a flight of stairs, he is rendered useless with a coma in the hospital- leaving poor Annabel to fend for herself with the unstable kids.  She does give it the old college try, eventually realizing that Mama was guardian to the children while they were alone in the woods, and that Mama has designs on sticking around.  She experiences frightening dreams which lead her to dig into the past of the mysterious guardian and finds some disturbing facts. Mama was an escaped mental patient who jumped off a cliff with her young baby (also called Lilly, if you can believe that) in tow.  Mama has developed an unwavering attachment to these children and will go to any end to keep them with her.  Unfortunately, Victoria begins to become attached to Annabel, causing Mama's wrath to unfold as only a long haired vengeful ghost's can.

So many of the standard ghost story tricks apply here. Mama's long dark hair flows out from the walls and closets, scurries across the floor like a weasel, and wraps around people menacingly.  Strange moldy-looking stains appear on the walls, and with further inspection seem to be a portal for the ghost that produces black moths that crawl out and fly about the room.  The new house is rife with electrical problems, with lights flickering constantly.  Information is easily obtained from the little old lady who works in the records room.  The good doctor's flashlight fails just when he needs it the most and he employs his camera flash to see the real Mama.  Ghostly creatures shuffle and walk with those jerky movements that are so overused these days... Like I said, not much new here.

What is at the heart of the story is whether or not the punk-rock Annabel (who did the dance of joy at the beginning of the film after getting a negative pregnancy test) will give enough of herself to entertain the idea of raising these children as her own.  Will she become attached enough to fight tooth and nail against forces unknown (or known, in this case) in order to save their souls (and their lives)?  Annabel isn't really a very likable person, so it's hard to imagine that happening.

Now. Back to the CGI.  As previously stated, I'm not a fan.  I'm tired that every damn movie made these days has to use this technique at some point.  Though there was an actual actor (Javier Botet, the creepy dude at the end of .Rec) playing the role of Mama, it was still obvious where the CGI was added - Mama's face was a little too fakey looking to me, and her hair was simply everywhere - flowing every which way and then some. Her crazy walk/crawl/run was totally CGI. What happened to just doing it the old fashioned way?  Like in the original '89 version of The Woman in Black, seeing the title character standing across the graveyard - it was a real damn person.  Not a caricature of one. And it was scary. Not cartoonish.
Same goes for Ghost Story, The Innocents, etc.  Please forgive my bitchiness, I'm just sick of everything looking like this:


Regardless, the actual amount of CGI in this movie really isn't too bad.  I've seen worse.  Much worse (i.e. Van Helsing). But I still feel like this film could have been done with practical effects.  It does however, lack a serious amount of chills and thrills.  There are a few jump scares that shook up the teenaged girls sitting in front of me (though I don't know how thy had the time to notice with all their texting), but as far as genuine fear, there was very little.  The story was weak (perhaps due it the film being expanded from short format) but the acting was decent. I had hoped this would be my first favorite movie of 2013, but to be honest I was left in the cold after watching it.  For all its good moments, it still failed to illicit any serious scares and I nearly fell asleep in a few of the quieter scenes.

So while it isn't a bad film, I would have much rather waited for DVD on this one, and will be wary of del Toro's endorsements in the future, having been terribly burned on Don't Be Afraid of the Dark and getting what I would call a little brush burn with Mama.

"Mothers are all slightly insane." ~ J.D.Salinger
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The Black & White Realm Of Horror: Hour Of The Wolf

January 24, 2013, 4:47 pm
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Review by Marie Robinson

Even though Ingmar Bergman is a damn good director, he has given the world only one true horror film. 1968's "Hour of the Wolf" (or "Vargtimmen") is a deeply atmospheric black and white film about a man and his wife and the time they spent an ocean-side cottage.

The film opens on the sweet and soft-spoken Alma (Liv Ullman) telling someone (us, perhaps) the story of her husband's disappearance. Her husband, Johan, is played by Max von Sydow, who seems to be a favorite of Bergman's. He's been acting for a solid 50+ years and still goin'. Also, I'm just going to put it out there that he is a weird looking man. I can never decide if I think he is good-looking or not.

Johan is a painter by profession and his personality fits that of most artists I've known; brooding, moody, and solitary. He begins acting strange and confesses to Alma that he is being haunted by a curious cast of characters, including an old woman whose face comes off when she takes off her hat and an old lover of Johan's. Because of these alarming entities, Johan suffers sleepless nights, forcing his wife to accompany him in consciousness until the dawn breaks.

Most of Johan's encounters come alive off of the pages of his journal, which Alma reads to try and get a grasp on her husband's increasing anxieties. The things we witness through Johan's written memories are bizarre and unsettling, and makes us question the mystery behind the man and his past.

The characters in this film are beautifully written. Alma and Johan bear an honest, true-to-life complexity, both as individuals and as a couple. The "ghosts" are wonderful in their spooky strangeness. Everyone gives a great performance, and Bergman gives his flawless direction.

I said before that the movie is cloaked in atmosphere, and the black and white film truly puts the edge on it. Shadows and darkness are crucial to the film, and there are many-a-haunting scene lit by candlelight.

As with any great ghost story, there is a huge psychological aspect. The viewer is always finding themselves cocking their head, pondering, "What is real?" In some films this is used as a weak attempt at profundity, but in "Hour of the Wolf" is a real, frightening connection the audience has with the characters. A good ghost story has you asking what's real or imagined. A great ghost story leaves you scratching your head about it long after the story's been told, and perhaps giving you no definitive evidence either way.

I will leave you with what is perhaps the world's longest tagline. "'The Hour of the Wolf'is the hour between night and dawn. It is the hour when most people die. It is the hour when the sleepless are haunted by their deepest fear, when ghosts and demons are most powerful".
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Kinky Sex And Horror. You KNOW You Wanna Read This Post ~ So Just Do It...

January 25, 2013, 6:36 pm
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By Marie & Christine

I  (Marie here) attended a screening of director Park Chan-wook's (Old Boy,Thirst) new film, "Stoker" the other day and boy did I love it. If you are familiar with his work, you have an idea of the mastery of this powerhouse filmmaker.

Although he doesn't write the original stories for the films he directs, he seems to have a specific taste, and one of the recurring subjects he deals with is unconventional sexuality.

Stoker stars Mia Wasikowska as India Stoker, an 18-year-old girl whose father has died suddenly in an accident. An uncle (Matthew Goode) she never previously new to exist comes to live with her and her cold, caustic mother (Nicole Kidman). He is an unpredictable and mysterious character who India soon becomes infatuated with.

Without spoiling anything, I will just say that there are many examples of strange sex in this film, some that will make you cringe or say, "Ew", but is undeniably interesting.
What gets some people off may seem strange and we often feel the need to search for roots and reasons to explain such, but when it comes down to it these are our most primal thoughts and feelings.

Let's take this opportunity to explore some (mostly) horror films that deal with taboo sex. Christine has helped me out with a few additions as well.

ANTICHRIST (2009)  LARS VON TRIER
Lars von Trier's controversial film deals with a couple whose life is shattered when their baby boy dies while they are having sex. The wife, billed only as "She", reveals to her husband on a secluded getaway that she has been working on a thesis on how women are the Antichrist. This movie is definitely worth a watch if you like to challenge yourself and watch really fucked up movies. I must warn you that this movie is extremely graphic, and you will never look at Charlotte Gainsbourg the same way again./MR

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DEADGIRL (2008)   MARCEL SARMIENTO
Two adolescent boys get much more than they bargained for when they act out their necrophilic urges on a corpse they find in an abandoned mental hospital. I remember picking up this movie at Blockbuster and this stranger dude standing next to me was like, "That's a good movie." And then I ran away./MR


KISSED (1996)   LYNNE STOPKEWICH
This isn't technically a horror movie but I'm putting it on here. Sandra (Molly Parker) has always been fascinated with death, but her fascination becomes an infatuation when she gets a job as a mortician and finds a passion for necrophilia. It's a romance about fucking dead people, sounds weird, right? It is, and there are some really strange scenes.../MR

EXCISION (2012)   RICHARD BATES JR.
Pauline (Annalynne McCord) aspires to be a surgeon and has a special kink. She gets off on blood and gore. This film was extremely well received despite what some might consider icky subject matter./MR

VIDEODROME (1983)   DAVID CRONENBERG
Cronenberg's cult classic is about a man (James Woods) who is looking for the next extreme in television programming and brings the boob tube to a whole new level./MR

CRASH (1996)    DAVID CRONENBERG
Also not horror but totally perverse nonetheless, another weird one from Cronenberg focuses on people who get off sexually on car accidents.  If it sounds too strange for words that's because it is. This film is so bizarre that James Spader has sex with Rosanna Arquette by using an open wound on her leg as a substitute for her vagina.  Very out there, even for Cronenberg./CH


  
AFTERMATH (1994)   NACHO CERDA
I doubt you'll find a more disturbing film than this quick, thirty-minute stunner.  It is the dialogue-free short in which a mortician does the worst thing possible with a corpse, and I think you know where I'm going here. Really does give necrophilia a whole new meaning.  It is grotesque, disturbing, and just plain vile.  And you cannot take your eyes off it.
But be warned, it is not for the horror novice.
(And to be clear, the DVD cover above is from the third part of Cerdà's trilogy (!).  I couldn't bring myself to show the actual cover of Aftermath. And that's saying a lot.) /CH


EYES WIDE SHUT (1994)    STANLEY KUBRICK
Not a horror movie, but still quite bizarre just the same.  Tom Cruise and then-wife Nicole Kidman decide to explore their sexuality. Just not with each other.  Indecent rituals, secret societies in which masks and passwords are the norm, and orgies galore are alive and well here in this Kubrick sextravaganza./CH


SALO or THE 120 DAYS OF SODOM (1975 )   PIER PAOLO PASOLINI
I'm really can't even go there.  You shouldn't either.  Seriously one of the most foul films of sexual depravity and graphic and disturbing violence you will ever see.  Or not see, which really should be the case.  If you look up the word 'controversial' in the dictionary there needs to be a picture of this movie poster beside the word.
Enough said. /CH
There are so many other films that are sexually distressing and entirely interesting - such as Lost Highway, A Serbian Film, Blue Velvet, Teeth, and Cat People(1982)  to name a few...Perhaps a Part 2 will be forthcoming...


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Sunday Bloody Sunday: Winter Horror Edition, Part 1

January 27, 2013, 5:00 am
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Hypothermia

Let The Right One In

Orphan

Ravenous

Sauna

Shredder

Dead Snow



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Mindless Movie Monday: Hypothermia: So Painful It's Funny (the movie, not the condition)

January 28, 2013, 2:10 pm
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In keeping with our 'winter horror' theme, I give you one of the worst movies I have seen in several years.

Hypothermia is a frozen romp of ridiculous proportions that has only one good thing going for it.  Michael Rooker. He is the glue that (tries) to hold this lame-ass film together, which is insanely difficult given the absolutely absurd "monster" that is terrorizing the group of ice-fishermen in this horrible film.

Larry Fessenden, director of such other snowy delights as Wendigo and The Last Winter, obviously has some sort of real fetish with winter settings for his films.  And though I've seen both Wendigo and The Last Winter and enjoyed them (the former more than the latter), this film really left a lot to be desired. Low budget or not, Fessenden was really phoning this one in.

Ray Pelletier (Rooker), his wife Helen (Blanch Baker), son David (Benjamin Hugh Abel Forster), and David's girlfriend Gina (Amy Chang) have rented a lakeside cottage for a fun weekend of ice-fishing. I suppose this constitutes as fun in some circles.  I prefer to fish when it is above 50 degrees - or better yet at the seafood department of my local supermarket.
When we first meet Ray, he's out on the ice, trying to find a good spot for the next day's adventure in ice fishing.  Whether not paying attention or pure accident, Ray falls through a think place in the ice and if son David hadn't come looking would have certainly died of hypothermia (hence the name, natch).

At first, I couldn't recall where I'd seen Baker, until some internet investigating turned up the fact that she played Ruth Chandler in The Girl Next Door - a film I hated passionately. So that didn't help her case. She was seriously hard to watch in this movie, her acting totally wooden and inept. The actor portraying David has next to no emotion in his acting and so I'd have to say it was rather painful to watch him also. Chang did a decent job as Gina, so I was hoping there would be a scenario in which she and Rooker were the last ones standing. 

But there were two more cast members to speak of.  Once Ray and Co. set up their little camp upon the ice and settle in to have bologna sandwiches and idle chatter, their solace is interrupted by an utterly obnoxious fisherman and his son who roll in with a big truck towing a camper trailer and snowmobiles. Steve Cote (Don Wood) and Stevie (Greg Finley) like to drink a lot of beer and eventually shout across the lake for Ray and his family to join them.  Steve has a New York/New Jersey mindset, with the accent to complete it. He thinks he's all that and a bag of potato chips and is unforgivably annoying. And loud, dammit.

Knowing if they don't make an appearance at the Cote trailer, the father-son team probably won't ever shut the hell up.  They make their way over and discuss the fact that there don't seem to be any fish in the lake.
What the hell happened to all the fish? They ponder this for way too long until they see something ominously large under the surface of the lake go swimming by, which causes a ruckus among the men and in a moment of stupidity Stevie sticks his hand into the water only to have the giant fish rake his sharp fin over his arm, tearing it open. 

Speaking of stupid acts, older Steve feels it unnecessary to take his son to the hospital, preferring instead to man-up and have a steak dinner.  Gina (who apparently has some medical training) cleans up Stevie's wound (which is practically festering at this point) and the men step outside to see if they can "catch this bitch!"
We see a lot of the fish-monster swimming just under the ice, and as you can imagine, the group starts dwindling as people start to die.
Despite all this foolishness, I can't say Michael Rooker does a bad job. In fact, he acts his pants off - giving his all to a pointless script. And while nothing can save the preposterous circumstances the cast finds themselves in, at least there is a bit of decent gore in here to get the audience by.

But here's what puts the nail in the proverbial coffin.  The monster is completely and utterly ridiculous. It is like a cross between the Creature from the Black Lagoon, a Sleestak, and the Cheshire Cat. I really cannot stress how thoroughly hilarious this "creature" is. If I thought it was a worthwhile film, I wouldn't show you what he looks like, so the element of surprise would still be there.  But forgive me I just can't help myself.
Witness if you will, the most laughable monster in film, perhaps ever.


I'm not sure what else I really need to say here, except that despite the fact that the body count keeps on rising it doesn't seem to deter our deadly aquatic creature from using his Crest Whitestrips.  He's got the nicest smile from here to Okinawa. 

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Snowbound: Winter Horror Films To Keep You Warm ~Part 1

January 29, 2013, 5:00 am
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The idea for a two-week span of winter-focused horror isn't hard to imagine with the winter we've been having.

Here in western PA, it's been downright nasty, with heaps of snow, ice, freezing rain, and plenty of frigid temps - the kind of cold air that freezes your nostrils when you step outside.

 Not sure it's been as bad in St. Louis where Marie is, but winter is winter - and we thought it'd be fun to set aside some time this year to highlight the frosty season. 

There are just SO many films to talk about that it's a sure thing that all of them will not be mentioned, but we wanted to spotlight as many as we can in these two weeks, so we're splitting them into parts. 

Best of all, we've got some help from across the pond for our fortnight of fun.  Belfast-based writer James Gracey of the fantastic blog Behind the Couch has agreed to help us out by writing about some of our chosen films. If you've never visited Behind the Couch, you simply must.  James writes some of the most insightful, astute, and absorbing reviews on the interwebz. Plus he's a really good friend, so I'd like to personally thank him for his most gracious gift of time.  I know that besides his terrific blog (and in addition to his actual day job), he's busy writing for such quality publications as Paracinema , Diabolique, and Exquisite Terror, among others.  Savor his words, folks.  He knows what he's talking about here.

So onward with the first installment of frosty flicks that you can turn to on a cold winter's night - or spend an entire shivery weekend with when you're snowbound and trying to fend off the cabin fever.....


THE SHINING(1980)

No list of winter horrors would be complete without the first film many think of when categorizing snowbound frights.  A former school teacher takes his wife and young son to the Overlook Hotel, a resort high in the Rockies that is regrettably located on an Indian burial ground.  Jack Torrance has been hired as the winter caretaker because the hotel becomes completely snowed in during the winter and getting up the Sidewinder Mt is a sheer impossibility.   As the temperature drops and the snow begins to pile up, Jack also has his own worries that don’t include whether the boiler is functioning alright.  Meanwhile, their strangely psychic son begins to sense something is very, VERY wrong at the Overlook.  While the film has subtle hints of terror throughout, it also gives us violent bursts of horror near the end with Jack beginning to lose his sense of reality as the frigid wind and endless snowfall make it impossible to leave the hotel.  The final act of the film - the chase through the snow-covered hedge maze - are terrifying and show just how well Kubrick has planned out the frosty ending. /CH


COLD PREY (2006)

A group of friends on a snowboarding excursion in deepest, whitest Norway seek refuge in a seemingly abandoned hotel after an accident. As a snowstorm howls outside, it soon becomes apparent to the group that they are not alone in the hotel… Deft execution, detailed characterisation, a deeply eerie atmosphere and brutally cold location sets this apart from the plethora of post-Scream slashers. A slow-building sense of dread and isolation is evident from the get-go and Cold Prey benefits from a script that consistently subverts expectations. When the group discover they are not alone at the draughty hotel, they do everything they’re supposed to: stick together, try to formulate a reasonable plan, arm themselves and support each other. Of course, they’re still doomed, but at least it’s refreshing to see characters in a slasher film use their heads. Consistently cranking up the tension and icy atmospherics, offering us an imposing killer and featuring a damn good final girl in Jannicke (Ingrid Bolsø Berdal) – Cold Prey is one of the most compelling, suspenseful and freezing slashers in recent memory./JG


THE LAST WINTER (2006)

Nothing says snowbound like being in the remote Arctic, even if it‘s your job. The fight to drill in the Alaskan wilderness heats up as a group of oil company employees start to experience strange occurrences at their site. The frozen tundra is the perfect place to have the eyes play tricks on you. Various members of the team start to hallucinate, even going as far as to wander outside in the Arctic temperatures - naked. What is out there in the snow?  The spirit of the Wendigo seems to make an appearance here as a catalyst between man and nature - and how the Earth might possibly be letting us know she’s had enough of our relentless ignoring of the environment. A slow burn, for sure - but if you can stick with it, everything but the very end is relatively unsettling, and the claustrophobia of being stuck together for a long period of time takes its toll./CH

GINGER SNAPS BACK: THE BEGINNING (2004)

A horror sequel that not only matches its predecessor in terms of quality and originality, but one that also expands and further explores the original story, is a rare thing. Ginger Snaps Back is one such sequel. While the first film tells of a young woman who is attacked by a werewolf on the night she begins to menstruate, and its sequel follows the plight of her similarly afflicted sister, this unexpected third instalment transports the story back to 19th Century Canada. Two sisters, Brigette and Ginger, seek refuge from the grip of winter in a traders' fort which comes under siege by a group of savage werewolves. Like its forbearers, this film locks together menstrual cycles and lycanthropy to reflect on monstrous pubescence and darkly humorous body-horror. Not just a rehash of the first film, Ginger Snaps Back has more than a few surprises up its fine-furred sleeve. By confining the story to a single location, the events boast a tremendous sense of desperation and claustrophobia, as cabin fever and snowstorms reach fever pitch, and all is enrobed in a wintry, desolate and utterly chilling atmosphere. /JG


 THE THAW (2009)

More environmental distress. Research scientists in the Arctic discover a wooly mammoth frozen in the ice and snow. Intrigued but cautious, the team tranquilizes a polar bear nearby which promptly dies when they get it back to their research station.  Soon after, members of the team fall ill with a mysterious malady just about the time lead scientist David (Val Kilmer)'s daughter (Martha MacIssac) arrives as an intern.  Deducing that the polar bear had apparently been feeding off the thawing mammoth, they also discover a bizarre bug was thawed along with it and apparently infected the polar bear. Hence, several members of the team have now been contaminated.  Attempting to be a cautionary tale about global warming and sticking your nose where it doesn't belong, The Thaw is a surprisingly effective creep-fest that will have you thinking. /CH

MY LITTLE EYE (2002)

Whether viewed as a dark and despairing critique of contemporary society’s obsession with voyeurism and ‘reality TV’, or a tightly wound, slow-burning slasher, My Little Eye is an effective shocker that succeeds admirably on all levels. A group of strangers audition for a Big Brother style web-series in which they are required to stay at a remote house in the middle of snowbound nowhere, while their every move is recorded by myriad CCTV cameras throughout the house and broadcast to viewers of a private website. Events take a turn for the sinister when the group realise the site they’re being broadcast on is a snuff site… It’s bad enough that the group take their time to realise something suspicious and deeply sinister is afoot, and that they are so isolated, but to top it all off, they’re entrenched in boundless snow and freezing temperatures, making their odds of hiking out of the house pretty much impossible. Bloody murders, paranoia, creepy night-vision camera work and the notion that someone or something is ‘out there’ in the dark snowy night wrap My Little Eye in an icy, claustrophobic grip that refuses to relent./JG

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Re-casting The Shining. Yes, I went there.

January 30, 2013, 5:00 am
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As many know, I'm not a big fan of remakes.
But I thought it would be fun to recast The Shining with my dream cast.  Not that I would ever want to see a remake of that classic (and quite honestly I don't care for the Stephen King-endorsed TV version from 1997 - partially because I detest Steven Weber in nearly everything), but since nothing seems to be sacred I figured I may as well re-imagine it myself.

And since The Shining takes place during winter and showcases a pretty nasty snowstorm, it fits within the realm of winter horror.


So here goes:

Jack Torrance:  Paul Giamatti - It's only natural that I'd pick Giamatti for the main role, as he is one of my favorite actors and has the serious acting chops to take this role in the various directions that it wanders to. He can play a quirky writer, we've established that with both American Splendor and Sideways. And I know he can act like a total nut-job (see Shoot 'Em Up, John Dies at the End). So I can see him going from mild mannered father who likes a drink or two to crazed, off-the-wagon psychopath with murderous intent and a crazed look in his eyes.  Like so:


Moving on to the light of Jack's life, Wendy...
It was hard for me to decide just who looks pathetic enough to pull off the emotionally abused and wildly confused Wendy Torrance.  And then after this year's Golden Globes it came to me... Anne Hathaway!
She has just the right combination of frumpy and bewildered that this character dictates.  After all, Shelley Duvall owned that role. (You probably would too after working with Stanley Kubrick and his countless script changes and hundreds of re-takes.)  Anne Hathaway has kind of come into her own these last few years and she really says Wendy to me.  She can look disheveled, chaotic, and wracked with fear better than most.


Danny. Now this one was tough, because of course I'm not too familiar with child actors. But after perusing the internet a bit, this little guy (and his bright blue eyes) jumped out at me. Currently Benjamin Stockham is starring as one of the president's children on the television comedy 1600 Penn. I'm fairly certain he could pull off that 'deer in the headlights' gaze that Danny is so famous for.  Only this time around, the stare will come from blue, not brown eyes.  I can almost hear him now "Redrum! Redrum! Redrum!'...


Dick Halloran. I had a myriad of choices on this one.  Hard to nail down.  I thought....Denzel?   Sam Jackson?  Even Morgan Freeman?  But then I thought... Don Cheadle! Yes!  I love nearly everything Cheadle does and can definitely see him interacting with our Danny and discussing the SHINE over a bowl of ice cream (but we're making that ice cream strawberry in my movie because well....I like it better).
Sure, Freeman would have been closer in age to the original Scatman Crothers when he played the Overlook cook, but there's just something about Cheadle that says yes. And I can absolutely see him chilling out in his bedroom in Florida with perhaps a poster of Jackie Brown behind him. Oh yes, he'll even put up a good fight with our Jack....who knows how it will turn out.  Maybe I'll change the ending and have him driving Danny down the Sidewinder in the snowcat.  Witness the coolness:


When casting Delbert Grady, I had to choose someone whose demeanor is relatively humdrum and monotone.  The original caretaker, Grady's part in the film is to guide Jack to his inevitable poor decisions by relaying the history of the Overlook and placing those ideas oh-so-gently into Jack's head.  So I need someone who looks that part - unassuming yet determined to have things go according to plan.  Who better than Kevin Spacey?  He can play the restrained everyman next door pretty damn well (see: American Beauty), and yet has an edge that can be quietly horrifying (see: Seven).  I like him in this role. It suits him.


And who better than one of the best character actors in the biz' to play our loyal bartender, Lloyd. Yep, Steve Buscemi.  Lloyd is always at the ready with the Jack Daniels to help ol' Jack see the error of his ways and help him get drunk enough to take an ax and hunt down his wife and young son. Lloyd won't take money from Jack, we know that - and I can absolutely see Buscemi embodying the role of the laid-back barman - though I'm thinking he might have a touch more sass than Joe Turkel.  But that would make things more interesting, don't you think?


In the small role of Danny's doctor (who was literally nameless), I'm going to put Mary Steenburgen.  She always seems sincere yet she frightens me for some reason.  Maybe it's because she's married to Ted Danson - that would scare anyone.  Yet here she is - asking Danny just who the hell Tony is, perhaps even mimicking his finger acrobatics.

 
As for the Grady daughters (who weren't actually twins, which is a common misconception), I have no idea who would be creepy enough to play the girls....but here's a thought....

"Come and play with us, Danny......."
Now here's where it gets interesting. I decided to put a little cameo in here.  We're going to have Jack Nicholson as Stuart Ullman, the manager of the Overlook and the bearer of bad news as far as the hotel's menacing history. Wouldn't that be the bomb - to get Nicholson to do just a cameo would be extremely difficult anyway as I'm sure he pretty much sees himself as a leading man - even at his age.  But let's just go there for shits & giggles.  I'd love it. It would certainly be the best part of the movie for us hard-core Shining aficionados!


So there you have it.  I know there are a few other very minor roles (like a few other Overlook employees and the ranger at the station) but for the most part, I think we got the major ones covered.
What do you think?  Yay or Nay?  Who would you cast?

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